CAITBHW: Day 3 - The People You Meet Inside Your Boss’ Head
For those of you who have just joined us, this week we’re Crawling Around Inside The Boss’ Head to improve our careers.
On Day 1, we learned about Crawling 101
Yesterday, Day 2, we read about what an example of NOT being inside the boss’ head looks like.
As we crawl around inside several bosses’ heads, you’ll notice something similar: Any “Boss Man” that has been the boss for more than a month has stereotypes of employees that cause him the most trouble.
He probably even makes fun of anyone who looks like those stereotypes when you’re not around. And, generally speaking, being made fun of by the boss is a poor career development strategy.
So today, we’re going to talk about The People You Meet Inside Your Boss’ Head.
THE PEOPLE YOU MEET INSIDE YOUR BOSS’ HEAD
I don’t mean to say that there are only bad examples in your boss’ head. It’s just that he sees these people in his employees a whole lot more often than he sees the positive examples.
Every time you do something to make your boss’ life harder, he is instantly (if quietly) comparing you to one of these people inside his head:
- Watchless Will - Will doesn’t have a watch and wouldn’t know what to do with one if he did. He’s always late for work and meetings (though surprisingly punctual about lunch), but at least he always has a good excuse.
- Phoning Freda - It’d be okay if Freda were calling everyone she worked with to get things done. However, Freda seems to have long conversations with other Fredas at other companies. Generally Freda is telling someone about the what someone was wearing (can you believe it!?), dispensing relationship advice, or complaining about her man.
- Chatty Cathy - Cathy is a lot like Freda, but doesn’t use phones. She stops in at your cube, corners you in the break room, or just follows you around the halls. Talking. Nonstop. The only escape is into the men’s room (if you’re a guy - heck, maybe even if you’re not), but she might be waiting for you when you come out.
- Busywork Bill - Bill is always doing something. It just isn’t necessarily anything that needs to be done. He’ll find the most insignificant problems around to spend all of his time on while the invoices to be checked and sent to clients are still in his “IN” box.
- Long Lunch ‘Lil - Lil seems to enjoy eating. Not because she’s fat, but because she spends a lot of time at lunch. She seems to be of the opinion that “Lunch Hour” means that she spends at least an hour at the restaurant and should take as much time as she needs going there and coming back.
- Smokin’ Sue - I don’t mean that she’s hot (though she’s generally thin). I mean that she is out in the smokers’ area puffin’ on a ciggie. Or two. Or a pack. Sue never seems to have enough time to finish her assignments, but she manages to get 3 or 4 or more 15 minute cigarette breaks a day.
- Extreme Management Challenge Chuck - Chuck may be productive at work and may be on-time, but he is still one of “boss man”’s biggest problems. That’s because Chuck seems to be at the boss’ door every 5 minutes with a new question, problem, or report on other workers.
- Negativity Ned - Nothing is right in Ned’s life. And he wants everyone to know about it. As a result, his work and work relationship suffer. Which he complains about endlessly.
Though he seems like the “97 pound weakling”, Ned is actually very powerful. In their weaker moments, Ned can turn any coworker into another Negativity Ned. And no boss needs 1 Ned, let alone 2.
- Egotistical Eric - Eric periodically does a good job. And you know that because he won’t stop telling you about it. And how valuable he is. And how everyone ought to do things his way. And how he ought to be catered to.
- Offensive Otto - There are actually a bunch of different Ottos who have all found their own ways to be offensive. Some are just plain offensive smelling. Others are constantly telling offensive jokes. Some are harassing all of the women who are forced to be in the same space with him.
Whatever his specialty is, there is one thing the same about all Ottos: their effects. People will go out of their way to avoid Otto and get in a bad mood even if they see him. Otto is perpetually in the way of having a happy office environment.
Keep in mind that we all do some of these things from time to time. Whenever I’m worn out any my brain is in a fog, I find myself drifting into busywork. It happens.
But if you find yourself in one of these categories on a regular basis, you know what to fix to get that next raise or promotion.
Enjoy the Search!
Dan
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Daniel R. Sweet
Owner / Author / Chief Cook-And-Bottle-Washer
FRACAT.com - Free Resume and Career Toolbox
LinkedIn Profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/danielrsweet
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